Sarah Sanders: God ‘wanted Donald Trump to become president’ – CNNPolitics
When famed basketball coach Bobby Knight was asked why he didn’t have his players pray before games he said, “Because God doesn’t give a damn about college basketball.”
(He added, “Because if he did those sons of bitches at Kentucky would not win a game.”)
What?!… God wanted the USA to become some fascist chaotic authoritarian state…. because there aren’t enough of those around. God just likes to see his children suffer and all that other rot. I’d prefer to think that God just wants to have some popcorn like the rest of us.
If I believed in hell… and a soul…I know where I’d want Suckabee Sanders to reside.
an interview with god back in 2016
daily beast reports:
As more and more members of the president’s inner circle get fitted for handcuffs, some of the president’s supporters are still hardcore,” Jimmy Kimmel said during his monologue Thursday night. “Chief among them his press secretary, Sarah Hucka-B.S., who said in an interview on CBN tonight that she believes Trump is in power thanks to the Lord God himself.”
Speaking to the Christian Broadcasting Network, Sarah Huckabee Sanders said, “I think God calls all of us to fill different roles at different times, and I think that he wanted Donald Trump to become president, and that’s why he’s there.”
“No, he didn’t,” Kimmel replied, laughing. “Even God was like, ‘What the hell? I can’t take my eyes off you people for a minute!’”
from the root another interview and point of view:
To get to the bottom of this story, The Root’s Michael Harriot negotiated a one-on-one conversation with God. The following is a transcript of our exclusive interview.
Michael Harriot: Thanks for taking this interview on such short notice. I know you must have been busy.
God: Not really. Today was a light workday. I spent most of the day keeping people in Chicago from freezing and watching Black Panther II (It’s better than the first one). Plus, as the master of space, time and ceremonies, I knew you were coming to see me.
MH: I’m sorry if I appear a little nervous. How should I address you? Should I call you Almighty? My Lord?
God: Relax, my child. I don’t need all those honorifics. I am known by many names. I really like the name LaKeisha but just plain old “God” is fine. Anyway, I want to thank you for calling Jesus on the main line and telling him what you wanted. I think I need to clear this Sarah Sanders thing up.
MH: Cool! So let’s get into it. Was Sarah telling the truth?
God: Well, I can’t say for sure. I don’t want to call her a liar. I mean … she does lie a lot, but I don’t know her very well. Just what I’ve seen on the news. As it says in the Bible:
MH: Wait … I don’t think it says that in the Bible. I think that’s a Jay-Z song.
God: Oh, right. I knew one of the “Hovs” wrote that.
MH: You watch the cable news?
God: Not quite. We have our own television network with no slant and no lies. We call it the “Not Fox News channel.” I’ve seen her on there a few times but most of the time I can’t stomach her—
MH: Her lies?
God: No, her eye makeup. What I’m trying to say is that her god might have wanted Donald Trump to win. You might want to check with Lucifer to see if she was quoting him. I haven’t talked to him since he was kicked out of choir rehearsal but I hear he spends a lot of time talking to Republicans.
I checked with the bouncers at the pearly gates and she doesn’t appear on any of our lists and I’m sure they’re correct. As it says in the Bible:
MH: Wait … I think that’s a Christmas song.
God: You’re right. I wrote that for my son’s birthday party. I’ve written so many good quotes, it’s hard to keep up.
MH: So you’re saying that you didn’t want Donald Trump to become president?
God: Do you know how much time it would take to manipulate the elections of every country on earth? No, my son. I leave that up to y’all. I stay out of politics and sports. Plus, ever since those white dudes came up with that stupid electoral college mess, I can’t figure it out anyway. Too much math.
I let you guys choose. I liked that Obama boy but I stayed out of it. I’ll tell you a secret, though …
MH: What’s that?
God: I thought Hillary was going to win, too!
On election day, I was hanging out with all the Moseses (Harriet Tubman, Issac Hayes, Moses Malone and the other Moses—you know, the one I text messaged the eleven commandments to) when I heard Trump had won. I must admit, I was disappointed in y’all.
The only other time I’ve been that ashamed of my creation is when someone thought it would be a good idea to go to Africa and steal some humans and that one time when the Atlanta Falcons blew a 25-point halftime lead in the Super Bowl. But like I said, even though they thank me when they win, I stay out of politics and sports. I’ll watch a few games or elections every now and then but I don’t get involved.
If I got involved in sports, they never would have done my boy Kaepernick like that. That’s why I stopped watching the NFL. Plus, I already know who’s going to win.
MH: So why do you think Sarah Sanders said that?
God: Well you have to realize who she was talking to. A lot of people claim to be down with my clique but they are really out for power, money or just whiteness. They say they are “pro-life” Christians but they’re for capital punishment and guns. They claim they’re for family values but elected a serial cheater and woman abuser. They claim to stand for law and order but that voted for a man who might end up in jail (Spoiler alert: Trump will be impeached before the 2020 election). They love using my name in vain even though the eleventh commandment says:
MH: Wait … I don’t think that’s in the Bible either. So who do you think Sarah Sanders was talking about?
God: Again, she might have been talking about Satan because she never talked to me. I barely kicked it with her father. I was so glad when he lost his bid for the presidency. After I saw what he did as Governor of Arkansas, I stopped fucking with him.
But no one should pay any attention to what a liar says because lying is what they do. I tried to tell y’all that there would be a lot of false prophets who will come in my name. Like I once said:
MH: Wait … I actually think Beyonce said that, not God.
God: Same thing.
I think god used god’s name in vain when SFB won. I gotta give it to Kimmel – Sarah HuckaB.S. That’s just brilliant.
I have it on very good authority that god does not like liars or racists
yeah…. right….
So does this mean that Trump rules through the ‘The Devine Right of Kings’?
God needs to get a more reliable polling firm.
For someone who is all powerful, God has a rather spotty track record in elections. I know for a fact that he supported both Al Gore and John Kerry.
How did that work out?
‘The Devine Right of Kings’
jace, you must mean andy devine?
no. this divine is definitely more trump-like
mercury news:
The FBI seized Roger Stone’s cellphones, computers and hard drives in raids on his house, apartment and office in Florida and Manhattan last week, prosecutors said.
Special Counsel Robert Mueller provided a glimpse of some of the items recovered in a brief court filing Thursday that explained to the judge why both sides will need time to prepare for trial. The government’s evidence includes “multiple hard drives containing several terabytes of information” with FBI case reports, search warrant applications and the contents of Apple iCloud accounts and email accounts, according to the filing.
The FBI also has bank and financial records and various electronic devices belonging to the confidant of President Donald Trump, they said.
The extent of the government’s evidence indicates that prosecutors have dug deeply into Stone’s activities and suggests they could make additional allegations against him. Right now, the U.S. case focuses largely on allegedly misleading statements he made to Congress. He’s scheduled to be in court on Friday.
[…]
In Thursday’s filing, Mueller’s team disclosed that agents recovered several years of communications that were contained in iCloud and email accounts and in computer files. Information seized in the raid will be turned over to Stone’s legal team after the FBI reviews it to remove material covered by the attorney-client privilege.
mother jones:
Inside the Crazy and Vicious Feud Between Roger Stone and Jerome Corsi—and Why It Matters
This face-off between right-wing conspiracy mongers could yield key information about the Trump-Russia scandal.
Patd,
Too ? funny
Herman Cain, the former pizza company executive who ran for the Republican presidential nomination in 2012, is being considered by President Donald Trump for a seat on the Federal Reserve Board!
Trump reminds me of the Oogie Boogie — a giant burlap sack filled with creepy crawly things Nightmare before Christmas
Honestly? It does sound like something God would do.
Yo, Flatus-
…was thinking (usually a bad idea, humor me), and i’m light-headed when i wake up, too. Maybe you’re just standing up too fast and since you’re groggy from sleep, anyway, you don’t notice the rush of blood from your head. Therefore, either get out of bed VERY slowly, or keep your water and such on the nightstand so you don’t have to get up at all? Just a thought, pardon me.
So . . . . Is sarah huckster the Woman riding the Beast ? Or, is that woman melanoma ? Or, ivanka ? Or, hope hicks/kellyanne/stormy/the playboy model ?
I think the author of Revelations could have been a bit more explicit without diluting the suspense.
Nein, nein, NEIN ! Not cain, the failed pizza king !
The two bernies are available : ebbers and madoff. Plus, jeff skilling. These guys are more appropriate to the trump/America financial deal.
Can our elected representatives PLEASE do the right thing and get this criminal cabal out of office? Pretty please? I’ll do extra chores.
I must admit that sarah’s god probably loves that name, cain. It’s so . . . biblical.
Unexpected. I’m agreeing with George Will
Amy Klobuchar WAPO Op Ed
Toby’s sleepover went well. Her new Mom wants to keep her. She has lovely new home.
Good job, C-Dub, glad to read that.
craig, happy news about toby. hope this is a sign that your dad’s Friday move will go just as well, the house will sell quickly without complications and all is good in Crawford land.
Good news. Good dogs deserve good people.
A full day in the office and I am reminded why I liked a few days away. At least I am able to give up my mid-morning nap without too much difficulty. It is the mid-afternoon nap that I am really missing right now. The weather is not doing much to help return either. I think the last load of fuel had water in it, so the water freezing in the water knockout and the diesel fuel thickening into jelly, there is no winter blend here, made a forty-five minute drive turn into a two hour drive, at least this afternoon it kept running, not well, so it was only an hour and a half. Bah. Work at home tomorrow.
I heard SFB held an Oval Office presser with his IC team in attendance where he did the 1984 dictator thing. What they said about the world was misrepresented, so called fake news, even though it was broadcast live. I am surprised they did not clap in unison for dear leader.
SFB’s approval rating at Rasmussen of 43% is now tied with his lowest in that poll since last January. He can’t believe how well he’s doing – understandable I guess, because his approval rating is about average for him. In fairness, Rasmussen aside, his 41% approval average at RCP is 4 points above his lowest average rating at RCP of 37.1 on 12/16/17, and 3.6 below his highest in the past year (Oct. 6, 2918). I don’t really look at the first 2-3 months of his presidency since the ratings were all over the place and he was just settling in – but if I DID it would show a drop of 8.5 points in his first 6 months – from 45.9 to 37.4%.
BB, in my prior life I lived in AL where there ain’t no winter blend diesel or anything else for that matter – a friend had a VW diesel Rabbit and experienced the same gelling problem when the temps dropped. After being stranded once, he did a little research and rather than buy what was fairly pricey diesel fuel conditioner he would pour a pint of isopropyl alcohol into the tank before a freeze came. Seemed to work fine, but I was of the impression that as a preventative it worked fine but didn’t do much if anything as a cure.
Craig… great news about Toby!
All the best for you and your dad tomorrow on moving day.
Pogo – hmm I would think a few drops from the pint canning jar would be useful too, albeit a touch more powerful than needed for a diesel though. We have a thaw coming and I will be able to drain and change the filter.
It is a powerful video to watch SFB tell the world not to believe what the previous day was sworn testimony. To tell the world that he, and only he, is the decider of truth and real, even if it is a phantasmagorical representation of his dripping brown sky universe.
SFB (dumbshit) confuses the concepts of “quoted” and “misquoted”. Utter stoopid shit. Goddamnit I hate the stoopid fucker.
Stupid, or a knowing saboteur out to destroy America ? I think the latter.
I’ve been thinking that he’s a saboteur since about May of ’17. Every passing day confirms me in that opinion.
XR, could be. Makes sense. Really, is it possible for one person to be that stupid?
new thread