“I thought at the time I should never get the peculiar disgusting smell of the vapour of warm human blood heated by the sun out of my nostrils. I would rather have smelt gas a hundred times. I can never describe that faint sickening, horrible smell which several times nearly knocked me up altogether.” — British Captain Leeham, talking about the first day of the Battle of the Somme, in ‘Tommy Goes to War’
By Blue Bronc, a Trail Mix Contributor
What does it mean to be Lesbian or Gay or Bisexual or Transgender, or any other person than white male in the missionary position today?
What is your feeling of safety? Of security in this world?
2007, I was discussing my first campaign with the chief of police. There was great concern that my running would be accompanied by protests and violence. We were over concerned, nothing did happen. While discussing FBI statistics regarding issues the talk came to me. “What are the odds I would be killed?” A very real question. At the time we in the LGBT community knew the number at 25% greater that a transwoman would be murdered over a male walking down the street. The chief, a friend now, thought a little and admitted that odds of me being killed were off the chart.
How often are any gay or transwomen assaulted and killed? Many police fail to even report assaults and deaths may be suicide or OD. The numbers are unknown, but are better than ever, at least a few more honest reports are filed. How many sex workers just disappear?
The other day a coworker asked me what my greatest fear is as a transwoman. Easily it is walking down the street alone. It struck her hard. Very hard. The reality is any woman walking alone anywhere is a target. Being a transwoman I know the current odds of being attacked and killed walking down the street. According to the FBI it is 100% greater than a male walking down the street.
I cry for those killed and wounded this morning. The sadness will not go away. The constant concern that some idiot, pumped up with the hate from Republicans, from far right wing idiots, from the “christians” (they are not Christian in any manner) and from other religions, will declare they are freeing the world of the gays and will kill us does not go away. Will this concern end? I do not believe it ever will.
How do we administer revenge? We are but a small percentage of the peoples of this community, this country, this world. We are not in a position to stop the attacks alone. Our lives depend on allies. Many allies from so many different communities. Allies from all religions too.
Do I feel scared? No. I and many others will not be scared. We will not be frightened back into the closet.
Well not much happened during the campaigns. I did get a few death threats, but not serious. Those were sent to my post office box. It was the one under the windshield wiper blade that got my attention.
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