If I Were Chief Justice

By Flatus, a Trail Mix Contributor

This upcoming Friday I would pull myself together, checking my wardrobe and making sure, even though my suit would be hidden by my judicial robe, that it was neatly pressed and had my USAF Good Conduct Ribbon on my lapel.

Although administering the oath to an incoming President is not a Constitutionally assigned duty, it is, so far as I am concerned, an awesome responsibility. I’ve done this task before, swearing-in our current President twice. Why am I feeling such anxiety now?

As I ride to the Capitol in the limo, that was two minutes early, I decide that I will change my usual script; I will preface some remarks prior to the oath: “President-Elect Trump, please understand that when I administer an oath of fealty, I personally monitor the performance of the sworn individual. In the instance of a person being elevated to the highest elected office of the United States, I will view breach of the oath of office in the most unfavorable terms. Let us begin:

Do you …”

I feel much better now, knowing that I will be putting Donald on notice and, at the same time, publicly assigning myself the responsibility for falling on my sword if he fails to do his duty.

More Posts by Flatus


Author: Flatus

Just an Ohlfahrt getting older--80ish widower living in northeast Columbia, SC adjacent to a beautiful nature preserve. Mind my own business--never go out nor entertain outsiders.

73 thoughts on “If I Were Chief Justice”

  1. !!!breaking news!!!

    “A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines.”
    ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

    From today’s  wapo: Trump vows ‘insurance for everybody’ in Obamacare replacement plan
    “We’re going to have insurance for everybody,” Trump said. “There was a philosophy in some circles that if you can’t pay for it, you don’t get it. That’s not going to happen with us.” People covered under the law “can expect to have great health care. It will be in a much simplified form. Much less expensive and much better.”

    During the primaries

    Bring on the hobgoblin!

  2. Pitch perfect idea bouncing around the interwebbies: President Obama resigns a day early, enabling Joseph Biden to be sworn in as #45 instead of you know who.

    Do it.



  3. Thank You for the Post, Flatus. I wish you were Chief Justice.

    For whatever reason this topic makes me think of the Saturday Night Massacre. Perhaps it’s the idea of ethics in government & saying no to an obviously compromised President.

    Shout out to Elliot Richardson & William Ruckelshaus. Just because.

    Remembering Robert Bork. Just because.

    Anyhow, all the best to Representative John Lewis & the good people who support him.

  4. btw, in no way did I mean to characterize that hobgoblin of promised universal health care above as foolish. for all his foolishness, this time he’s not.  only hope that he means it, that the congress critters acknowledge that’s what the citizenry want and that said critters unanimously adopt it.

  5. for more reasons then the swearing – in, I would prefer Flatus as chief justice

    Celebrate the legacy and courage of Martin Luther King and all who ran towards him.

    Every time there is a chance to do the right thing, Trump takes the other direction.  What is he having for his MLK day dinner – fried chicken and watermelon?

  6. Craig:

    Pogo, time is wasting. Trump recently tweeted she’s “guilty as hell.” If Obama doesn’t pardon her there is a reason.

    Have to admit I don’t understand this remark.  Trump was the one leading the “lock her up” chants.  No one can show me even one email that was “From” Hillary Clinton that contained anything that violated security.  No matter how you color it, all those thousands of emails came down to exactly three that were suspect and even they did not carry any official designation of security.  Everyone fell for the charges and spin and then party & right wing attacks took over.

    The only reason Obama would have to “Pardon” her would be for any future invented charges Trump & Scum could come up with.


  7. Jamie, as I posted in last thread, she might not want a pardon as to some folks historically this seemed to admit there was a crime from which to be pardoned and this may be what fearless leader meant by

    If Obama doesn’t pardon her there is a reason.

    I still would like to see a pre-emptive pardon in the same vein as you suggest for any future invented charges additionally declaring that no crimes were committed by her during her term as sos.

  8. “The only reason Obama would have to “Pardon” her would be for any future invented charges Trump & Scum could come up with.”

    Jamie, that is exactly why I referenced Chaffetz, Sessions and Comey.  And were I Obama I would make a presidential statement that he does not see her as guilty of any crime, but that the partisanship displayed over the past 8 years warrants a pardon to protect her against unsupported and frivolous litigation.

  9. bw, same fantasy but preceded by lightning bolts knocking the bible out of hands, flashing at his feet making him dance like in the old cowboy movies and booming voice from above saying something on the order of but in more elegant language “you’re fired” .

  10. As I have commented before, I accept the results of the popular vote and the electoral college in this last election.  Although I believe the electoral college was won by manipulation, russian hacking, fbi intrusion, fake news, it is the data manipulation and machine learning by kushners kompter kids that sealed the deal.  And even if this digital hacking of machines actually happened (only 17 counties have to be hacked to create the 70,000 vote lead in battle ground states), herr drumpf still ‘won’ the electoral college.  And guess what?  It is ‘legitimate’ as any other election through time.  I doubt if we have ever had an entirely clean election, but we are evolving.  This is our system…yes, we are prisoners of the two -party system with our closed primaries in half of the states of the union.  If we open-up the process and stick majority rule? Perhaps the popular vote will eventually become the single elector.  Things may seem saner and fair.

    As for those boycotting the inauguration?  They have been eating the birther turd for so long…it is the karmic thing to do.

  11. Holy Hail! Alas, there has been nothing for Mother Nature this election cycle, but she has been making herself known to most voters this winter.   We had a violent storm on Saturday and we received 2.5 inches of rain in less than a day.  A photo of our backyard flooding — beyond the rock wall, a small river started flowing through the arroyo.  2.5 inches of rain is equal to one third of our normal  annual rainfall.

  12. Dream scenario:  We eliminate the Electoral College.  We increase the size of the House to more accurately reflect the size of the population and the number of people to be represented by each member.  Gerrymandering is declared illegal with each district to be designed as compact as possible.  The number of poll locations will be equal in all districts.  At least one “Souls to the Polls” Sunday during voting period.  Vote by mail for all elections where practical.  Every vote must have a paper record.


  13. Found this on Twitter. Like the Coneheads, it’s “from France.”

    I like the cut of your judicial robe, Flatus.

  14. As for health care overhaul?  Repugs always bring out the overused and phony prop of the ‘tax credit.’  When you are poor and make a pittance, you cannot ask a tax credit to give you a pap test or a prostate examine.  If you pay no taxes beyond consumptive taxes, it is a useless tool.  I guess for the poor, it is back to the charity health care….omans, ministers, priests, rabbis and shamans administering and ministering health care.

  15. Flatus…   great post!

    Well….  I am boycotting the inauguration.  A good friend is leaving shortly to spend the next 6 weeks in Florida.  I want to see her before she leaves.  The only time she can give me is Friday.  So another friend and I will be meeting her at a cherished Italian restaurant and toasting to her good health and happy vacation.  I’m sure I’ll see the highlights here on the net and the tv news.

  16. By the election of trump and the continued control of congress by the Rips, we have entered “a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man’s fears and the summit of his knowledge. This is the dimension of imagination. It is an area which we call the Twilight Zone.”  I bet Rod Serling never thought he’d see the day that his dimension between the pit of man’s fears and the summit of his knowledge would become the state of the nation.

  17. I had every intention of attending the inauguration until, well, you know.  I’m trying to figure out what the historic nature of this inauguration is that Rips are claiming it is.  We’ve never had a spray-tanned orange, dyed-blond president before? That doesn’t seem worthy of “historic” stature to me.

  18. Pogo, what timing.

    Also from Twitter; the photo is said to be a  TV listing from a Scots paper. The Scots are an independent and creative bunch, all right.

    We need to summon our inner Rod Serling. Why the heck not?

  19. This is fun.  Someone made the suggestion that Obama should resign allowing Biden to be the “45th” President.  The picture is one response to this delightful suggestion.

  20. Since I’m not watching the inauguration, would someone be kind enough to describe the contents of the bleachers and behind the barricade crowds.


  21. A pardon is Not a bad idea. Timing is everything. I would do It and announce it on the morning of the 20th. Given the media’s hatred of Hillary, the pardon, not the inauguration would become the story of the day.

  22. Just as GWB used the color terror code alert system (dropped in 2010) to dog whistle the fear-voting base, trump uses Clinton to get him to that sweet spot of support and victory.  ‘Lock her up’ hysteria will never go away.  Whether I see it live or on vid, I will watch the inauguration many times…just so curious about the former chiefs and their missus standing next to the pale faces of herrs drumpf and pence. Plus, the treat of actually hearing clarence thomas’s voice this Friday…it has been barely heard throughout his accession to the supremes. First time many young humans will hear him speak….oldsters remember his confirmation hearings.

  23. jace…good on you for the comey recommendation.  I still believe herr drumpf will use his iconic “you’re fired” for the ‘no longer instilling confidence’ cop.   As for those who claim it is political suicide for  Obama to get rid of comey as herr drumpf will only appoint a bigger and bad-ass puppet, get a grip on reality.  comey is no firewall for the citizens.   Just like the secret service, cop shops like the fbi can have problems, too, which have deadly consequences.

    And those that claim herr drumpf is like reagan or nixon?  At least nixon and reagan were western presidents…cali-guys with homes in the golden state.  herr drumpf is stirring the pacific pot and my fear is that the nork with the dylan roof haircut won’t mind dropping some radioactive stuff on west coast of the US….California, Oregon, Washington, Alaska (and of course, Trudeau’s Canada).  herr drumpf will think he is safe in NY.  The west coasters are blue anyway and were beyond his electoral hack in the election.

  24. BW,

    Like them or not, Regean and Nixon actually had experience in governing.

    The pussy grabber of the United States is simply a shallow pretender with no experience whatsoever .

  25. President-elect  Pussy Grabber is like the president who cried wolf – right now everyone gets whip lash when he starts tweeting soon he will just be so much background noise

  26. KGC

    gonna’ activate my twitter account. If he can tweet so canI and the PGOUS

    ain’t gonna’ like my tweets.

  27. this morning:

    SCARBOROUGH: ….I’m telling you this will not last. This weekend alone, Harold, he is in fights right now. We have the preeminent civil rights leader in America with the entire intelligence community, perhaps the most important community to have on your side as president, and the most dangerous to cross politically. The single most important military alliance of our time, according to his own Secretary of Defense, NATO, and the single most important leader in all of Europe, Angela Merkel. That’s just on this holiday weekend. This will not last. This will not continue. Somebody around him better tell him to focus.

    Also, I’m sorry. And he told the Republicans he was going to run them over if they didn’t follow whatever he did. This will not continue indefinitely…

    If anybody thinks around Donald Trump that he can succeed as president of the United States with no message discipline — he has no message discipline — the same way he succeeded when he was running against people like Ben Carson, then they’re kidding themselves. They’re just kidding themselves… There is no message discipline and there has to be because it matters.

  28. Jace, His twitter handle is @realdonaldtrump.  Just follow him if you want to read all the lovely insults he gets whenever he tweets anything.

    Beware of any tweets from @realdenaldtrump. It is a spoof account that has way too much fun pretending to be the real Donald.


  29. MrD, lol.  I knew I couldn’t be the only one to feel the twilight zone connection.

    And Jace, i love the idea of announcing a pardon for Hillary on stumps inauguration morning. Wonder if it would draw a 140 character response.

  30. Joe S sounds like Lucy Van Pelt at the Christmas pageant rehearsal. “No, no, no.  You’ve got to have discipline…”  Does he?  Does he have to stay on message?  Just like charm got Obama really far without having much of a voting record in the Senate, so has un-filtered, free association gotten Trump to where he is.   If Trump doesn’t think it’s broke, why would he try to fix it?

    Obama should probably go ahead and pardon Hillary.  If Trumpco starts pulling the thread between the State Department and the Clinton’s slush fund/foundation…

    I’m still relieved it’s not Hillary.

    Until Trump actually Fs something up really badly (rather than just doing things that make me uncomfortable, like picking most of  his cabinet),  I’m giving him a chance.  So, I guess it’s just me & Dave Chappell giving him a chance.

    Predictions for the first 100 days?

  31. Great topic Flatus!

    Trump is in way over his head – and the problem is that he still hasn’t really entered the water.  There are so many things going on right now that make one throw up in their mouth – this is a nightmare.  I have yet to find a way to put this into any kind of frame that represents logical understanding and reason.

    Obama will never pardon Clinton – he stopped taking his testosterone pills years ago.  Clinton would never accept a pardon – it’s a subtle admission of guilt.  Obama, on the other hand, has already checked out – and is counting the hours until he can move the heck out of the “crowned jewell of the American penal system” and become a regular person again.  He’s going to make millions on a book and in a couple of years should be a major player in the realm of helping others aka Jimmy Carter.

    Trump and the Republicans have painted themselves into a corner that they’re not going to be able to get out of without getting covered with paint.  I thoroughly expect the Republicans to take Trump out after he’s been in office 2 years and 1 day.

    BTW – Trumps new idea of “health care for all” has got to be playing well with Mitch and Paul ;o)

  32. If I were administering the presidential oath of office to the Presumed Usurper, I would turn to the Secret Service guards and scream, Lock him up !  

    But what the hell, I’m old and sick man, a hopelessly romantic patriot in constant pain – what do I have to lose ? In my condition I am invulnerable and utterly free. almost. There is that little problem of my not being the Chief Justice. sigh.

  33. 1st hundred days?  Probably fill that SCOTUS seat the Dems were too craven to, and start pushing some case up there to overturn Roe V. Wade.  The assault on that decision is going to play out like a medieval siege.

    While everyone’s focused on that, the R’s will be dismantling the institutions that comprise our government, like the Dpt. Of Education, and deregulating every industry they can.

    During all that time, the Bully-In-Chief will be harrassing and intimidating political opponents on Twitter.

  34. During the official swearing-in charade there will be an Opposition Party get-together in The Loft in our co-op.

    The invitation calls it An Equality and Justice for All & Inauguration Watch Party. We’ll write letters to our new congressturd, jason lewis, have an Inauguration Trivia Quiz, and play Pin the Tail on the Elephant. I doubt that we’ll actually watch the Washington Parody of Legitimate Transfer of Power. I know that I won’t.

    I think the ‘Equality’ in ‘Equality and Justice for All’ is redundant. Perhaps I should call it predundant, instead.

    The President has only 3 days, 19 hours and 45 minutes to apprehend the unregistered agent of the malign foreign power.

  35. The peaceful transfer of power to foreign-controlled facists is a hallmark of our democracy, xrep, how dare you.

  36. cbs: Angela Merkel replaces Hillary Clinton as prime target of fake news, analysis finds

    and the journal: Facebook is cracking down on fake news in Germany before Angela Merkel seeks fourth term

  37. lotsa luck you guys.  the bully bros now have you in their sights. one down and y’all to go.

    the guardian:

    ‘Europe’s fate is in our hands’: Angela Merkel’s defiant reply to Trump

    Chancellor joined by French president in making curt comments about the US president-elect’s remarks about Germany, EU and Nato

  38. Bink, I don’t think the 1st 100 days will be like that. However, my crystal ball seems to have a serious malfunction.

    I suspect that the rippers will be shocked, shocked ! at the revelations about the kgb and trump. Of course, they will tell us, he isn’t a real puguglicanine. He infiltrated.

    I presume that they will work quickly to remove the satanic usurper, trump, and install the holy pope pence. Enter, side right, the 12th century.

  39. clever retort to the twit from above guardian article:

    In his interview, Trump indicated that he would aim to realign the “out of balance” car trade between Germany and the US. “If you go down Fifth Avenue, everyone has a Mercedes Benz in front of his house, isn’t that the case?” he said. “How many Chevrolets do you see in Germany? Not very many, maybe none at all … it’s a one-way street.”

    Asked what Trump could do to make sure German customers bought more American cars, Gabriel said: “Build better cars.”

  40. If the GOP has anyone at least half as brilliant as you making their game-plan, xrep, we are fucked.


    Oh, wait; they do: Putin.

  41. speaking of buying American, wonder what the twit buys and if the gov’t provided caddy limos will be good enough for him.

    according to cheatsheet 5 of Donald Trump’s Favorite Cars, 1 is a Mercedes, 2 are rolls and 1 a Lamborghini.  he does have a chevy Camaro pace car though.


  42. Well I see drump’s senior director of strategic communications at the National Security Council (national security spokes liar), Monica Crowley, has “stepped away” from trump town amid the plagiarism charges leveled at her.  Why would she think THAT would concern trump?  It’s not like she’s his wife or anything.   Ironically enough, her plagiarized dissertation is entitled “Clearer Than Truth: Determining and Preserving Grand Strategy: The Evolution of American Policy Toward the People’s Republic of China Under Truman and Nixon.” Clearer than Truth? Bwahaha.

  43. I would not be offended if nobody showed up for the inauguration.  The weather forecast has changed again, but not enough to make a good day of rain.

    Looked at a nice boat this afternoon.  A trawler which needs a touch up of bottom paint and new zincs and is then ready to be floated and run down the Bay and out to somewhere with a little sanity.

  44. Spoiler alert.

    If the oath of office is administered in Russian,we’ll know the  ‘fix’ was in.

  45. jace,

    Spoiler alert part deux: Forecast Quote of the Day for January 20, 2017:

    “DJT is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I’ve ever known in my life.”

  46. BB
    I used to go over to the Mira Flores locks of the Panama Canal and watch the vessels transit. Saw a fair number of trawlers with Asian crews. That was 40+ years ago.

  47. The ignauguration will be well attended—- by a bunch of hooligans looking to bus’ some heads of those nasty protesters

    and dopey keef will egg them on.

  48. Is it probable the various intelligence communities have a plan, maybe Operation Ratfinkovich, to deal with a hostile, incoming President?

    Many Americans feel their security compromised, as do our allies, over the prospect of this joker being in command of our military and intelligence agencies. Distrust. So might the IC keep information from new bosses? Might they have created internal cell groups to keep Trumputin & Co. out of the inner loop?

  49. mrdoodlesdog,

    What if the hostile foreign country has incriminating info on our intelligence guys? Perhaps the boldness with which the President-Elect treats them may be because he knows something. And they know he knows. And he knows they know he knows. And so it goes ….


  50. Sjwny,

    Hymie the Robot from “Get Smart” died. Just when we really needed him.

    I’m a mind that Trumputin knows zilch. Bluffs. Cons. Steals. Skips town. Except now he can’t skip.

  51. Jamie,

    That guy Lincoln sounds pretty neat. I understand he’s a Republican, too. Maybe he’lol speak at Friday’s Putinpalooza.

  52. Hmmm. That Lincoln fella was ahead of his time.

    Sturg, Toby Keith…think he ever got a boot up his ass in a bar fight or did he chicken out from bar fights too? Tough talk from the stage I guess.

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